The Umbrella Academy hit Netflix on February 15th, and in proper Netflix fashion we at Two Beard Gaming binged watched the entire season. Adapted from Dark Horse’s series of the same name, the show follows the cynical Hargreeves family – a ragtag group of adopted individuals with X-Men-esq powers that are trying to stop the apocalypse. Enter the villains Hazel and Cha Cha, hired to make sure our heroes don’t succeed.
Hazel and Cha Cha are some of the world’s finest time-travelling assassins. Donning disturbing animal masks and well-kept suits, their names strike terror in everyone around. Even our heroes themselves know if Hazel and Cha Cha are hunting them, they are as good as dead. Netflix mostly stays true to the heinous characters, but there ends up being major differences between the show and comic book it’s based on.
First introduced in Volume 2 of the Dark Horse comics, the pair of killers are first shown obnoxiously enjoying some pie at a small downtown ma and pa diner, where a waitress named Agnes works. When they loudly ask what was in the pie, the owner jokingly answers that he’s been offered tons of money for the recipe, but “you’d have to chop off my arms and legs to get that outta me!” Of course, Hazel and Cha Cha do just that. Abducting both the owner and Agnes, the owner is shown in a bloody and gory mess, missing all his limbs while Cha Cha nonchalantly stands there with a blood-soaked hand saw. Agnes is kept alive to provide more of that delicious pie.
These are sugar loving psychos. The only thing they might care about outside of some sweets, are each other. They bond and hug over girl scout cookies before getting geeked up to launch nuclear missiles to ensure they eliminate their target. This would kill themselves in the process, but they are not a bit phased by it. Ironically, they do end up killing each other while being possessed by Séance, the Hargreeves hero that can communicate with the dead. This thwarts their plans, and they don’t get the chance to create atomic chaos on Earth. The heroes win again.
Now their adaption for the big screen. Netflix takes Hazel and Cha Cha, and makes the psychopaths more human and relatable. Cha Cha loves her job and wants to work with her partner forever, finding fulfilment in each assignment. Hazel is ready to quit the assassin life, and wants to settle down with his new-found love, Agnes. This brings our terrible duo at a crossroads. What begins as a pair determined to complete their mission, we see their bond crumble as Hazel plots his way to a quieter life. We see Hazel’s passion to change his life, and we couldn’t help but to be on his side. A far cry from the man we saw hand sawing off appendages in the comic.
A Two Beard fun fact – Hazel and Cha Cha were supposed to just be one assassin named Bruno that wore a Mickey Mouse helmet. Disney probably wouldn’t approve.
We can’t wait to see what happens to the villains in season 2 of the show. We’ve grown to love seeing the ever-changing dynamic between the two. Plus, every time we see Mary J Blige playing a killer, we can’t help but laugh. So, what version of Hazel and Cha Cha do you like better? Let us know in the comments below, on Twitter or our Facebook page!